Having kids in your wedding… it seems like most couples are firmly rooted on their position regarding this. While some couples can’t imagine a wedding without a ring bearer or flower girl (“Oh, they’re just so cute, and who cares if they don’t make it down the aisle without having a temper tantrum! That just adds to the wedding day memories!”), other couples are on the total opposite side of the fence (“I swear if one little kid is crying while I’m walking down the aisle, I’m going to be pissed!!”).
Whether or not you have kids in your wedding is very much a personal decision, and sometimes not an easy one to make! For those of you who may be undecided, let’s go through a few pros and cons to make sure you are thinking through both sides of the argument, shall we?
YAY! Having Kids in Your Wedding
- For couples with sons or daughters, nieces or nephews, or close family members with children, having them in your wedding creates amazing memories for the entire family. I was a flower girl a time or two in my aunts’ weddings, and although I only vaguely remember the experience, there are some photos of me in a little white dress to prove it!
- For traditional brides, having kids in your wedding allows you to fill the ring bearer and flower girl roles. Of course, you don’t have to have these elements of your wedding party, but couples that are traditionalists will see no other way.
- Kids can be so darn adorable! Some of my absolute favorite photos from weddings involve kids. I mean, c’mon.. how stinkin’ cute are these pictures? Tiny kids holding hands, being goofy, and not to mention, their cute little tiny outfits!
Photo by The Mamones
Photo by Celina Gomez Photography
Photo by Joshua Aull Photography
NAY: Not Having Kids in Your Wedding
- Let’s get real for a minute… kids can be unpredictable. Even the most outgoing child can decide they’re too shy to be in the spotlight on wedding day, or the most well-behaved kid can have an unexpected temper tantrum. The thing is… they’re kids! You just never know what a four or five-year-old is going to do (or not do) on the wedding day.
- As silly as it might sound, kids can often become the center of attention on what is supposed to be the couple’s big day. An adorable flower girl with a short attention span doing pirouettes during the ceremony is sure to get more attention from your guests than the ring exchange. All eyes should be on the bride and groom, but if one of the kids in your wedding is distracting, you can guess what your guests will remember.
- Adding children to your wedding adds to the overall event expense – ring bearer pillow, flower girl basket, an extra boutonniere, flower petals for tossing. These costs are minimal, but if you’re on an extremely tight budget, these additional costs can add up.
If you do decide to have children in your wedding, maximize their chance for success on the wedding day by keeping their tiny little kid needs in mind. Do they need a nap? A kid-friendly snack? Will it be better for them to walk down the aisle and then sit with their parents as opposed to standing during the entire ceremony? (The answer here is a resounding YES!). Thinking through things like the time they get ready and how long they must be around for photographs will help ensure they are at their best. Set yourself up for success!
So, what do you think… Yay or Nay? Will you have kids in your wedding?